Sleep is a necessity in life, sleeping too much is a waste of time

Within weeks after Barry was on the curb of his former room mates, I had an appointment for a sleep study.  I still  slept most of the day and the doctor's thought it was my thyroid.  I finally got their attention when I was in the office and fell asleep sitting up on the exam table within minutes of them leaving and returning to the room. 

A sleep study was ordered to see why I slept so much.  The thought process was I might have sleep apnea. Barry had been living at my house for two weeks and I was apprehensive about going in over night to the hospital for this study, but I needed it done and someone to watch Puppers.

I went in at 9:30 that evening and prayed every thing would still be there the next morning.  He hadn't given me any reason to not trust him at this point, but I was still skeptical. The room where the sleep study was performed was like a five star hotel.  I was wired up for testing and informed to just do what I normally do.  Within minutes, I was asleep.  I slept for six hours when they woke me up at five in the morning.

I  had passed the night time sleep study, so they needed to keep me for the day time sleep study.  I called my boss to tell him I would not be in the office and informed Barry as well.  The technician explained the "rules" of the study. I would be allowed to sleep for twenty minutes every two hours.  If I fell asleep within those two hours, I would have to come back another day for testing.

First, I felt fully rested and I couldn't imagine I'd be able to fall asleep every two hours! But what was I going to do? I was wired up to this machine and held hostage in a nice room with a flat screen television and a book.  Some would say I was in heaven.

My next "nap" was at seven.  I doubted I would be able to sleep, but at six forty five, I was begging them to start the test early.  Fifteen minutes later they calibrated the equipment and whispered in the microphone that I could sleep.  Twenty minutes later, they woke me up and again, I couldn't imagine I'd be tired in two more hours.

Breakfast was served after my first morning siesta.  Breakfast in bed, could you beat this?  My next siesta was at nine.  Again, fighting to keep my eyes open for ten minutes before this next round was a struggle.  Twenty minutes later, they woke me up. After my eleven o'clock siesta, lunch was prepared and served.  I could almost get used to this!

My last siesta was at three in the afternoon and by four, I was free to go.  I failed the day time study.  The testing revealed I could fall into a deep sleep called REM (rapid eye movement) any where from twenty seconds to the longest, one minute and forty five seconds.  A normal person takes up to ninety minutes to reach this stage of the sleep pattern. I was diagnosed with narcolepsy. I was a mess.  I had been diagnosed a few years earlier with restless legs, so I had been sleep deprived at one point in my life and now, I was catching up on lost sleep, by sleeping all the time.

I was referred to a neurologist for this disorder.  The first doctor I saw prescribed Ritalin. In adults who suffer from narcolepsy, this acts as a form of speed.  In children, it enables one to stay focused, especially those who suffer from attention deficient disorders. 

After several months, I was having all kinds of issues and had no idea what they stemmed from. The only thing I had changed was to add this pill to my morning regime.  Before I called the doctor though about the side effects I was having, I researched them on the medications I was already on.  I wasn't on but a couple and every one of them had the same side effects.  My conclusion was I had not had these before, so the Ritalin must have been the trigger.

I made an appointment with the neurologist and took in my research spread sheet.  I had listed the medications I was on, each side effect, the common denominator's and how long I'd been on each with no side effects, then the introduction of the new medication and the appearance of the new symptoms. My conclusion, I was having side effects of the Ritalin.

I laid out the spread sheet so the doctor could review it.  He was an arrogant man and informed me I shouldn't take and list the side effects and think about them.  In other words, he thought I was a hypochondriac! I went from calm to irritated in seconds.  I know my body and I know when some thing is not right.  He was not listening.  Just like the other doctor's who claimed nothing was wrong when I brought to their attention I was sleeping more than normal.

I switched doctors.  In my profession, I work with many doctor's and knew of a neurologist that had done miracles on several of my workers compensation claimants.  I made an appointment and she ran a few tests.  She concluded that I had narcolepsy and I was having side effects from the Ritalin.  She prescribed other medication and scheduled a follow up.  

The next follow up was within six months and it was winter time.  I wore a fur coat I had bought at a vintage shop.  It was not real, but apparently it looked real. She came into the exam room and instantly she had an attitude.  She just sat there staring at  me.

"What are you here for today?"  Her tone of voice confirmed her body language, she was having a bad day, or she did not approve of some thing.

"You wanted me to come in for a follow up."  One would think you should reference your chart to see why I was there? Just saying, I don't go to doctor's just for some thing to do.

"I certainly hope that animal you are wearing is keeping you warm!" Yes, there it was, she was upset that I had on a fur coat.  I wanted to tell her it was fake, but she had just pulled the pissed off trigger and I was ready to cut loose.

Her exam was not thorough at all.  She sat there in disgust at what I wore so I thought I'd give her a little bit of her own medicine. "Nice shoes, leather I presume? Wonder how many cows were killed for that pair?"  

I got up and left. Doctor's are a dime a dozen and I found her when I was treating with someone else, wasn't going to be a problem finding another. The next doctor I found was a dream come true. He is a caring and considerate physician.  He took time to listen to my full history and I mean listened because he manage to figure out I had more than narcolepsy going on in my life.

I had worn night splints on both hands for over fifteen years.  If I didn't, I would experience symptoms similar to carpal tunnel.  I had been wearing a bite guard for over ten years, ever since Chappy and I were going through a divorce and I suffered the intense jaw pain.  The doctor suggested I was just "wound a little more tightly than others" and a muscle relaxer at night would assist in relaxing me to a point I could rest without fighting it.

He suggested I take one half of this pill and was confident it would knock me out as it did his other patients. The first night, I took a half and nothing happened, not even sleep. The next night, I took a whole one and still nothing.  This went on for a long time.  I currently take four of these muscle relaxers at night and I can sleep roughly four to five hours and still be functional the next day. The doctor finds it hard to believe that I can take so many along with the medication for my restless legs and still function.  He thinks I should be in a coma, but as he said, I am tightly wound.

The best part of this is that I have not worn wrist splints in over two years.  I still need the bite guard as I grind my teeth while I sleep, but that is a small token to pay for four to five hours of sleep.

Sleep is needed to function and knowing what I know today, it was probably an issue long before it was discovered.  Lack of sleep or rest creates many other problems, especially with day to day life. It creates an urge to eat carbohydrates to boost your energy level, which can add weight. It makes you feel sluggish, which can reduce your activity levels. It can make it difficult to focus, which can develop in to problems of getting things accomplished.

I am driven.  It is my nature and so that has helped me work through this, but there are days, after long periods of time with limited sleep, that I crash and can spend the day doing nothing.  This manifests in to guilt. I feel guilty if I am not accomplishing some thing as my list of things to do grows greater each day.

Why are we so hard on ourselves? It is because we feel we are expected to achieve greater things? Are we trying to please others who look up or down to us? I find myself working against the clock, trying to achieve more in a day than most can accomplish in a week.  Why?  I know it will be there tomorrow, but so will many other things.  I need to learn to stop and smell the roses before it is too late.

I have taken time since Bill's death to do just that, but I need to do it more. Life is a gift that should be cherished.  You are given life by your mother and father, how you treat it, depends on how long you are blessed with it.