In a year, so much can change

In 2002, I attended this same conference. It was the National Workers Compensation conference and it was big.  It's held at McCormick Place which is the largest convention center in North America, south of Chicago on Lake Michigan. The Hyatt Hotel is connected to the convention center and from your hotel room to the area the convention is held, takes roughly three days to walk there.  It is all inside, but it is a long, long walk.

That first year I attended, I was by myself.  I participated in many of the sessions, but I spent a lot of time talking to vendors in the area where their booths were.  Chappy was there, this is what he did, attended these  conferences and schmoozed people.  I was still very thin. We had been officially divorced for almost a year and a half and I had not seen him since the day he came to pick up his final load of belongings. I had heard from him, but only when I emailed, to remind him his check was late.

I am sure he was not happy with me, even more after our divorce was final.  I had waited, timing is everything, and once the ink was dry on the paper, I gathered up all the evidence and drafted a letter to Min. I reminded her of the conversations she had had with me voicing her concerns that I did not understand commitment and that marriage was not a cake walk.  I pointed out to her that she should have had this conversation with her son and I laid the the paper trail out for  her to see, the sweet Chappy that she continually reminded me of how lucky I was to have, was a womanizer, a cheat, and an adulteress. I not only shared with her the woman who he had left me for, but I let her in on the story of Vicki, Paulie, Diane and numerous others. I let her know that she gave him his reason for leaving by covering for Sissy when she divorced, "God does not intend for you to be unhappy, that is why he created divorce."  I'm not a Bible expert, but I don't think God created divorce. And she didn't believe in divorce until her daughter was faced with no other option.

I challenged her to face those indiscretions with John Boy and see if she wouldn't suffer from depression as well. I left no stone unturned as I laid out her son as a man who had no morals. I sent it so that it would arrive on our wedding anniversary, September 11, 2001, but due to other events of that day, mail was delayed and it was delivered on her birthday, timing is every thing.

He would always be quick to point out the fact that I had failed to give him "his" Bose speakers and I was quick to respond, "you said Bose speakers, you didn't give me serial numbers or descriptions, you got Bose speakers." Some times I had to  wait a long time for a response to some little dig I took while going through that period, but eventually, he'd throw it down as if I were  going to back off and say, "Oh, sorry, it's OK then that your check is late." He should have known by now, I was  not weak in any sense of the word.

As I walked through the aisles of the booths, chatting with people I'd known for years or new people who I had done business with, but had not met yet, I spotted Chappy.  He was watching me walk down the aisle toward his booth, our eyes locked and we both nodded, but he was immersed in conversation with customers.

We saw each other often through those three days, but we were always with someone else and then it happened.  Fate.  I was walking back to the convention center from my room and he was walking toward the front of the building where I had just come from.  We rounded corners, no one else with us, no one else in site and there we stood, face to face. We did what used to come so natural for  us, we hugged and we hugged like we had missed one another.  We could have just passed, nodded heads, acknowledging each other, but we didn't, we stood there for over two hours and talked about every thing  and nothing.  He told me he was married to his job as if I didn't know this.  He said he was not "made for relationships" and I assumed the waters at home at become rough.  We caught up on family and we just talked.  It was late, I had missed my session and he was headed back to his room, I turned and we walked back toward the front of the building, holding hands, laughing and chatting like we had years ago, in happier times.

We stood at the front of the building where I  would go north to my room and he would go west to his cab and as we stood there saying our good-byes and reassuring one another that we were doing just "great" in our new life, tears welled in both of our eyes.  We hugged and kissed as we departed and as I walked back to my room, I  wondered had Courtney not been involved where we might have been that day.

The next year, 2003, Bill traveled with me to the convention. It was as though  history was repeating itself. The same thing happened down to the moment we met, in the same spot, only this time I was headed back to my room and he was headed to the convention.  He hugged me, but it was as though we were strangers.  He told me things were not going well with Courtney but he didn't elaborate. He was working more hours, he didn't have to tell me what was going on, I knew what it was like to be Courtney, alone, waiting.  I stood there for less than ten minutes, making small talk and then I excused myself, "Chappy, it was nice to see you, but I have someone more important waiting for me back in my room.  I wish you the best" and I walked away never to see or talk to him again. I felt free.  I felt invigorated. I was in love and Chappy Schafer was not going to rain on my parade that day.

I got back to the room and shared with Bill what had happened both this year and last.  I told him how much Chappy had aged in a year, from working so hard. I was telling Bill that so many commented on how I "just glowed" that year. I knew, Bill was the reason for my glow.  I blew the afternoon off and we went downtown shopping.  We had a great day in Chicago, playing around as only we could.  On the drive home, Bill kept remarking how happy he was that we had met and that I "was so normal."  I'm not sure what he had been used to, but apparently, his prior life had not been so "normal." When we got home, I was on vacation the week of Thanksgiving having requested it off for my cruise, I took it to help prepare for our first family holiday.  Life was really good.  I had it all, but the most important thing, I had my Bill.